5 Responses to definition rewrite-doglover

1. davidbdale says:

   March 5, 2024 at 10:45 am

   Thank you for requesting Feedback, DogLover.
   Before I start, how much time are you willing to invest in revisions this go-round?
   —DSH

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2. doglover7025 says:

   March 5, 2024 at 3:39 pm

   Hi! I’ll spend an hour on revisions! Thanks

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3. davidbdale says:

   March 5, 2024 at 7:22 pm

   In that case, you’re first up, DogLover.
   I’ll put in my hour now, starting at 6:30pm

   —Your work needs a title. Remember, it’s a wonderful chance to start persuading your Ideal Reader even before your first word. Make it work for you.

   The word “mean” holds many meanings. In the math world, a “mean” is a “is a numeric quantity representing the center of a collection of numbers and is intermediate to the extreme values of a set of numbers”. Another definition “intend to convey, indicate, or refer to (a particular thing or notion); signify.” or “they are being unkind to another person, for example by not allowing them to do something”.

   —I’d call this a cute opening. They can be valuable, but I think you’ll be able to come up with a better one before your Portfolio.
   —The first one that comes to my mind (which would be appropriate considering the age range of haters you might be highlighting in this essay) would be a reference to the movie “Mean Girls.”
   —Keep your periods and commas INSIDE the quotation marks. NOT like this: allowing them to do something”.

   There are many different definitions to a word, and many people intercept different meanings and feelings for words, like the word “mean”.

   —This is needlessly repetitious.

   In society today, people are haters and some people will go out of their way to be mean to you. They will yell at you, complain at you, write hateful comments on social media.

   —We DON’T USE “YOU” in this class. I’ll explain in more detail more than once during the semester. Suffice it to say here that it creates an adversarial relationship with our readers. WE and OUR are better whenever you can manage it.

   The point is that many people have different definitions for different words. What you think is correct or right might not reflect on the other person. Many people in this world have different versions of the word “mean”.

   —DogLover, I think that’s the third time you’ve repeated yourself.

   That’s not to say that what they’re doing isn’t hurtful, but the word might have a different meaning to them.

   —The content of your paragraph is unexpectedly nuanced. I didn’t think you’d be excusing haters, but you seem to be giving them a pass for being ACCIDENTALLY mean. Is that really what you “mean”?

   To one person for example, voicing opinions could be considered hate. They might think it’s mean because you’re not agreeing with what that person has to say. Many people consider conversations or arguments mean or hateful all because the people in the conversation don’t have the same viewpoint.

   —I wonder, DogLover, whether I am to blame for your insistence here on emphasizing the range of positions about the word “mean.”
   —I didn’t expect you to spend 1000 words to tease out the many ways people could misconstrue hate. I apologize if this is my fault.
   —You haven’t begun to introduce a hypothesis yet, which is dangerous for any essay writer because readers won’t spend much time on an article that hasn’t declared its “politics,” so to speak.
   —If you go on for another paragraph debating with yourself about what’s mean and what’s not, I don’t think you’ll hold onto your audience to the end.

   That also applies to in person and on social media sites like Instagram. If you’re in a reply thread with people who think differently than you, you could think that the person is being mean, but they just have a different stance on that subject and it’s okay.

   —Now THIS point is truly crucial, and if you could push it all the way to the top, just below your perfect Title, you can grab attention in a very meaningful way.
   —For example:

   . The Clock Is TikTok-ing for Online Hate
   We all agree that hate speech on social media is toxic, abusive, and very dangerous to sensitive youth. But legislating what qualifies as hate speech is a thorny problem, and free-speech advocates have a clear constitutional right to insist that their words are protected. This essay will provide a clear set of rules for the online community to recognize the characteristics of hate speech so it and its practitioners can be lawfully banned from social media.

   —That could replace your first two paragraphs and launch you quickly into a meaningful essay.

   Unfortunately, we all have different viewpoints on what we consider hate. “A social approval-based theory of online hate suggests that the motivations and gratifications of those who post hate messages are not primarily to antagonize their ostensible victims.”

   —This is a very useful consideration.
   —If you’re using 1000 words to tease out the characteristics of hate speech, one of them could be, as you suggest here, “Was the harm inflicted intentional?”
   —I’ll respect your opinion either way, but it seems to this reader that hate speech MUST inflict harm, but it DOES NOT HAVE TO BE intentional.

   It all goes back to viewpoints. The “haters” might be posting something that wasn’t necessarily rude, it was just misinterpreted. Obviously, there are people on the internet and the real world that are just straight up rude, but then there is a group of people who are painted as a “hater” but they are just voicing how they feel.

   —This also is an essential consideration.
   —But you’re not drawing clear distinctions between Hate and Rudeness.
   —You’re right that both are open to interpretation, but that doesn’t mean a website has to welcome both, or either for that matter.
   —I don’t think anyone would defend the “right” of a social media user to “never be offended.”
   —But a social media community could surely enforce a set of standards that would protect itself from language that is unapologetically offensive.

   The impact of being mean to someone can be intense. It can lead to feelings of sadness, or anger. It can lead to a low self-confidence, and behavioral responses. The people that are hateful just get to hide behind a screen for example, being mean and negative, but don’t have to deal with the negative effects. That’s the issue with social media. Some random person can sit in the room behind a screen and tear another person down, but does not receive any negative repercussions.

   —This will be very valuable CAUSAL material for your next 1000-word argument.
   —You might be able to phrase it so that it qualifies for inclusion in your DefCat argument too, with effort.

   Even though there are many positive effects of social media, there are negative effects as well and this negative effect seems to be a very popular issue around the world.

   —Causal

   That is why I think that hate should be banned from social media. Freedom of speech is a topic in the social media field. Some people say things that they shouldn’t on social media, but then defend themselves by saying “but I can say that I have freedom of speech”. No you can’t, because of the laws. Social media laws and guidelines are different from each other. These platforms have their own conditions and terms/ guidelines. The “freedom of speech” card can’t be used because of these laws and they can and will ban you.

   —I see you’ve come around to the point I wanted you to make in the first paragraph. I’m glad you’re here.
   —You’re exactly right that “freedom of speech,” a term that VERY MUCH requires your careful definition, doesn’t obligate a community to let anyone enter their space and shout whatever they want.
   —Group Pages on Facebook, for example, all have Moderators to enforce community standards. They post guidelines for hospitality and ban repeat violators. There’s no appeal to a higher court for these disputes. No law or court protects the offenders or sanctions the moderators for abusing their authority to adjudicate on behalf of their members.

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4. davidbdale says:

   March 5, 2024 at 7:38 pm

   NOW FOR THE REST.

   But the issue is, the people keep making different accounts and will most definitely find a way to come back and hate on you and tear you down. Because of these laws, people can’t get into trouble that’s legal oriented, but they can still lose their jobs if their employer sees this hate, or lose “brand deals’ ‘ if they’re an influencer.

   —Again, this is Causal argument, which will be quite useful to you.
   —You have a bit of a head start on your next 1000 words.
   —You can’t be sloppy, though, with your own use of terms.
   —”Because of these laws” doesn’t refer back to any laws you’ve mentioned.
   —Readers also need to know exactly what sorts of sites, pages, apps, you propose to clean up with your program.
   —Some let groups manage their own house rules.
   —Most give users the chance to block other users from their feeds.
   —Etc.
   —I presume you’d want all social media programs to moderate their entire membership just as group admins do on facebook groups. Is that right?

   If we find a way to ban hateful users permanently, if the evidence is credible and sufficient, we might finally be able to positively use social media again. Everybody, no matter who, should be able to go on social media and post what makes them happy. The hateful people that tear others down negatively affect so many people and it makes people feel like they can’t share what they want. —I use social media in ways that make me perfectly comfortable.

   —When twitter became X and lost its freaking mind, opening its space to horrible hate speech, I cut it from my life.
   —Do I have a right to demand that X be hospitable for me? I would argue: No.

   In conclusion, people tend to have different viewpoints on what being considered “mean” is. We need to be able to live a life or show our lives on SM, without getting hated on. It would make the world a better place, and the positive effects would really show. It would boost people’s confidence, improve their mental health, and also improve acceptance.

   —That’s cool, . . . but.
   —Is your argument 1) Every online SM platform should be compelled to abide by the same rules of behavior?, or 2) The world would be a better place if SM was friendlier, or 3) Here are the rules I would impose on social media to ban hate speech from being tolerated anywhere?

   It’s now 7:30pm.
   You owe me an hour of Revision Time, DogLover.
   Your Provisional Grade has been posted to Canvas. It is not the grade you want, but it’s not supposed to be your final grade. This is a Rewriting course.

   MAKE ALL YOUR REVISIONS HERE on the Rewrite post. Leave your Definition argument post intact for comparison. And put this post into the Regrade Please category following your substantial improvements.

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5. davidbdale says:

   April 11, 2024 at 12:07 pm

   I see radical improvement here in several places, DogLover. You still seem reluctant to define what actually qualifies as Hate Speech (and how to distinguish it from Inadvertent Offense and Overly-Sensitive Reader), but I’m thrilled to see your thoughtful revisions.

   Regraded.

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