Original:

There is a huge problem in Vancouver with heroin addicts committing crimes to support their habits. The “free heroin for addicts” program is doing everything they can to stop the addicts. The problem is that there is a large crime rate due to the addicts. It is obvious that addicts have a hard time getting through their day to day lives. Daily activities such as jobs, interactions, and relationships are hard to maintain because of the fact that they are using. By heroin users being addicted, they will do whatever they have to do to get their hands on the drug. The types of crimes committed are those of breaking and entering as well as stealing. There are no limits to where they will go to retrieve this drug so that they can feed their addiction. The problem with this program is that it won’t help to ween these addicts off using heroin. It is only trying to save the city from rising crime rates that they’re up to. By providing the drug, these addicts will be off the streets, which in turn will prevent them from committing minor street crimes. This will also keep the heroin users out of the hospital. It is pointless that the hospitals have to deal with people that want to use bad drugs or unsanitary needles and find themselves being unable to afford hospital bills and hard to cope without the drug. This program gives people free heroin in the cleanest way possible. This will in turn fix the city  but not the addiction that these people face.

New version: 

This city of Vancouver is suffering from an epidemic of heroin addicts committing crimes to support their habits. The “free heroin for addicts” program has the goal of aiding to the decreasing crime rate of heroin addicts. However the crime rate has not seen much of a change. Daily activities such as jobs, interactions, and relationships are a difficult part of daily life for addicts. No matter the cost, heroin addicts will do whatever they can to get their hands on the drug. It has come to be known that breaking and entering, and stealing are the most common crimes committed by addicts, all to feed the addiction. There is an inconsistency with this program, not only does it enable the addicts, but also keeps them addicted to heroin. The crime rates are still immensely high, as well as the number of addicts. The only benefit is that by providing the drug, it will keep heroin users from flooding the hospitals. By providing clean needles and uncontaminated substances it solves the dilemma of unpaid hospital bills, and less beds available for ill patients. The program allows heroin addicts to receive the drug in the cleanest, and safest way. However the addiction at hand is still severe, and this solution is not preventing it or fixing it.