Kindness Kills
Tonight, I’m asking you to do the hard thing: criticize a fellow writer who has made an effort to persuade us of a truth. Last week you were permitted to both praise and critique, but we’ve run out of time for nurturing one another. Tonight, you can only find faults.
It’s Not You, It’s Me
In doing so, I mean to liberate you from your compulsion to be kind and empathetic. with a week to go before the deadline to publish research papers, we need to fix problems without delay.
Thank you, Authors
For the most part, the authors represented here are ahead of the game. They published Rewrites on time. Those of you whose work does not appear here are even further behind. Instead of being relieved that you escaped being criticized below, you should probably be disappointed that you’ll miss out on the critiques of several careful readers.
Euthanasia
The paragraph in blue below is the bulk of the author’s Causal Argument about Euthanasia.
- Can you tell what the Author is trying to prove (single effect with many causes? single cause with many effects?)? If so, explain what the Author is trying to prove.
- In what way(s) does the Author fail to make a persuasive Cause/Effect case?
- What causes or effects have been omitted or neglected?
- Imagine you’re a member of a jury deciding whether euthanasia should be legal based on the arguments here. In what ways does the evidence and reasoning fall short of convincing you?
- Correct the grammar if you can, particularly the runon sentences (and comma splices).
The desire of euthanasia can be the effect of years of dealing with the constant pain that certain terminal diseases can cause a patient. The argument is made that with enough medicine, there is no such thing as “unbearable pain”, that with enough pain killers, the patient won’t feel a thing. Not only does this method of dealing with the pain become very expensive, it can create a loss of dignity. First, constant sedation of a patient becomes very costly. Whether the patient has insurance or paying out of packet, it is going to cost someone a lot of unnecessary money. Second, when a patient is being kept alive by heavy doses of medicine, they lose their sense of independence. The patient becomes confined to a hospital bed, their only outside contact is those who come to visit them. They can begin to feel like a burden to their loved ones, knowing that, even though it sounds terrible, their death would ease a large amount of stress from their families shoulders. All of these struggles causes the patient to want their lives to come to an end.
Forgetting Childbirth
The paragraph in blue below is the bulk of the author’s Causal Argument about the Benefit of Forgetfulness.
- Does it make sense that suppresses painful memories for our benefit? A woman who forgets the pain of childbirth might be more likely to have another child. But a man who forgets the pain of third degree burns might be more likely to play with gasoline and matches.
- Does it help or hurt the Author’s argument to ignore pleasant memories?
- As you know, claiming that an Author shows “insufficient evidence” is not an effective rebuttal, but can you offer any small evidence of your own that would refute this paragraph?
If you were to ask a woman what child birth felt like, she might describe the experience as the most painful experience of her life. The soreness after birth, may remind a woman of the pain she went through during her time in labor. However, as time goes by and soreness fades, the memories of a painful childbirth begin to be forgotten. Therefore, a woman may want more children afterwards. If a woman was able to remember every moment of childbirth and the intense pain associated with the process, she may not want to go through the experience of a tough labor again with another child. A year after giving birth, the woman may describe the experience as “not so bad,” where weeks after the birth, she described the experience as “the most painful experience of her life.” If we weren’t able to forget painful memories, we wouldn’t be as willing to experience memories again that may end painfully. Our memory shields us from everlasting unpleasant feelings by fading away details of an event.
Free Heroin
The paragraph in blue below is the bulk of the author’s Causal Argument about Free Heroin for Vancouver’s Addicts.
- Does the Author make a Causal Argument or something else? If a Causal Argument, critique the causes and effects. If something else, describe the failure to concentrate on causation.
- What is the most persuasive evidence? How well does it persuade?
- The Author appears to object to the program. Is the rationale for that objection apparent?
Normally when clinics offer treatment for heroin addicts they try to get them to stop using and become clean. A person couldn’t possibly be treated if they were still using, it would defeat the whole purpose of the treatment. Vancouver thinks the complete opposite. Clinics in Vancouver offer heroin addicts free heroin. The clinics claim that by giving them heroin they are keeping them off the street and keep them from getting bad drugs or AIDS. The addicts have a choice whether to go to a detox center or not, if not they can get free heroin for life. They are just sustain their addiction.
Desperate Housewives
The paragraph in blue below is the heart of the author’s Causal Argument about The Pursuit of Happiness.
- The Author is making a Causal Argument. Are we clear what the terms of the cause(s) and effect(s) are?
- How well does the Real Housewives example illustrate one half of the comparison between superficiality and meaning?
- Would the Housewives of Atlanta agree with their characterization here? Does it matter that they might not recognize their superficiality?
Superficial aspect result in despair. Desperation is not a good way to live ones life. When someone yearns for something they can not receive or will not receive this is portrayed as desperation. As stated in previous papers the Real Housewives of Atlanta are a perfect example of showing women who yearn for unnecessary, materialistic items to try to gain happiness.Their superficial pursuit results in a race for who can have the most and who can gain it the quickest.The cause in this demonstration, to gain “happiness” through the newest and best objects money can buy. The effect is a life that is unfulfilling due to the constant disappointment that maybe the best of everything is unattainable.
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Counterintuitive Spring 2024 
Free Heroin
1. this paragraph by itself is not a causal essay. This is more of an argumentative essay. There is no real introduction of a cause and effect relationship. IF the author goes on in the essay to introduce causes and effects that is one thing, but from what is shows there in no attempt.
2 the source of persuasion here seems to be in logic. The author uses the logic that a clinic that provides herion to addict can never treat an addict of their addiction. “A person couldn’t possibly be treated if they were still using, it would defeat the whole purpose of the treatment.” seems to be their main claim.
3. as said above, “A person couldn’t possibly be treated if they were still using, it would defeat the whole purpose of the treatment.” seems to be the main rational for the objection.
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Free Heroin
1. The cause and effect of this argument is from the clinics giving the heroin addicts free heroin, they are just sustaining their addiction not helping. The cause and effect was vaguely stated.
2. the most persuasive evidence is when the author says “The addicts have a choice whether to go to a detox center or not, if not they can get free heroin for life” because it puts in contrast something that is logically going to help the heroin addict and something that is counterintuitive in helping the heroine addict. This evidence is persuasive it just needs to be expanded upon.
3.yes the rational for the authors objection is very apparent
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Euthanasia
1. The author would like the reader to feel sympathetic towards the patient who desires to be killed. The upkeep of this patient is costly and degrading, go to the doctor to have your life ended, it is just easier.
2. What if the terminal illness is curable if caught at the right time? It would obviously be cheaper to kill the patient anyway instead of wasting money on a gamble.
3. N/A
4. The patient does not need a costly doctor to end their life.
5. The first sentence states that euthanasia has a desire. Also, if the patient is constantly sedated, how are they aware enough of anything to be lacking in dignity? The last sentence could be rewritten, “The unbearable pain causes the patient to long for life’s expedited end.”
Happy thoughts…
Forgetting Childbirth
1. It depends on where the peak in pleasure or trauma is in the event, that could determine what is retained.
2.N/A
3. Some of the most vivid memories humans harbor, are tragic and violent ones that replay themselves in thought. An excessively pleasant memory and an excessively traumatic memory both peak the chemical senses similarly, having equal noticeability in memory.
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Euthanasia
1.The author is trying to prove the different causes that result in patients wanting to end their lives. Such as, money, emotional burden, loss of independence
2. They seem to be repetitive on the aspect that it is costly to keep people alive and sedated. The person does not include important information that may sway the readers views like the patient’s quality of life.
3. The author does not really go into detail about the pain or depression a patient might feel, also the quality of life is a big aspect and should be touched upon more.
4. It does not have much passion or emotional pull like it could have, it also seems a bit repetitive and like the words are just said to get down on the paper
5. The argument is made that with enough medicine, there is no such thing as “unbearable pain”. That giving the patient enough pain killers they won’t feel a thing.
They can begin to feel like a burden to their loved ones. Even though it sounds terrible, the patients death would ease a large amount of stress from their families shoulders.
Forgetting Childbirth
1. I think it makes sense that we suppress memories in some aspects, like in childbirth not remembering the pain as so brutal may help the women have more children. Also, after childbirth we have the reward of a beautiful child. But in injuries we don’t get anything joyous from them afterward so we just remember them as painful
2. If we forget painful memories, we are also eligible for forgetting pleasant ones as well, which hurts the author’s argument.
3. I would refute this paragraph by saying that the mothers do not forget how painful child birth was they just look at how it brought a beautiful child into the world, so that pain was worth the benefits.
Free Heroin
1. It seems as though the author is making a rebuttal argument not a causal argument. Instead of pointing out the cause and effects the author simply states the opposing argument’s views.
2. The most persuasive claim is that the addicts could get help to stop using but why would they if they are receiving free drugs. The claim is persuasive but there needs to be evidence to support this claim to make it stronger.
3. It is a bit confusing because at the beginning the author says how it won’t help but then goes on to say all the benefits the program offers.
Desperate Housewives
1. I would assume that the cause in this argument is one’s desire for money and the effect is their happiness, or superficiality.
2. The real housewives example does portray the superficiality and wealthy aspect of the argument but are these women happy? Does the money and fame really bring their happiness?
3. I don’t believe the Housewives of Atlanta would agree that they are superficial because that term usually comes with negative connotations, the fact that they do not recognize their superficiality may hurt the evidence in this argument.
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Euthanasia
1) Single effect with many causes
2) There arent many cause and effect situations pointed out
3) What causes the medicine to be so expensive
4) It does not state how the family would feel about the person dying
5) Paying out of POCKET. Confined to a hospital bed AND their only contact…
Forgetting ChildBirth
1)I believe there are certain painful memories that can have benefits from forgetting. Not all.
2)Help
Free Heroin
1) Something else. The author does not state what causes the clinics in Vancouver to think this way or do this
2) That a person couldn’t be treated if they were still using
3) It could be more apparent
Desperate HouseWives
1) No
2) Pretty well
3) No. They would defend their superficiality. Yes it matters.
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Euthanasia: The second sentence is a run on broken up by commas. A semicolon should be placed somewhere or it should be made into 2 different sentences. It seems like the author is trying to prove why euthanasia could make a patient want their life to end.
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For the Desperate Housewives, I do think they are causes and effects, but only a limited amount of them. I found one exact cause and an effect to it so I definitely think there can be more causes and effects that relates to each other. For the example of the Real Housewives of Atlanta, I think it would be really helpful if there is a specific example from the show to explain and show that having a superficial life will only end up devastating their lives, if that is the argument being made. I think that the example of the Desperate Housewives does show the side of the superficiality, however I think it can become more specific and detailed to further explain and show the comparison between meaning and superficiality. I think it does definitely matter that the Housewives do not recognize their superficiality because it can further the argument being made; how focusing so much on the materialistic things in life can change a person for the worst and not care about the really important necessities in life, taking them for granted.
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Forgetting Childbirth
1.it makes sense if the painful memories that are being suppresses offer a good outcome, which helps them be suppressed. Even though child birth may be painful the present of a new born child is worth the pain(to some).
2. it hurts the authors argument to ignore pleasant memories
3. mothers could not be suppressing the painful memories of child birth, but decide it is worth the pain to have the child
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Euthanasia:
*1st sentence: Euthanasia is a way for terminally ill patients, undergoing constant pain, to end their suffering.
1) Author is trying to prove that euthanasia is a viable and more humane alternative to making terminally ill patients suffer through life. (Sedation is costly, Lose Dignity, Easier on Family)
4) Someone has to kill the person in question. Doesn’t make the argument for the doctor that would be doing the euthanizing. Would be condoning the death of people, have to prove that death is a more humane using specific cases.
Forgetting Childbirth:
For women it is different with childbirth being a special case. If women didn’t forget the pain of giving birth, the species may not survive. There is a biological imperative for women to forget the pain of childbirth over time. Making the argument that memory shields us from pain is a risky task. By doing so, we as a species may become cold distant and unfeeling, devoid of emotion by our own doing. Feeling the pain is important for love and loss, part of what makes us human. We still remember pain and suffering, it just may be slightly more dull. However, symptoms of PTSD last far longer, making people feeling the pain of combat for years afterward. They don’t forget it.
Free Heroin:
*Last sentence: They are just sustaining their addiction.
Makes the claim that the addicts are given a choice, presumably right and wrong. By offering a choice at all they are undermining the idea that addicts can get clean. Not a strong argument because it doesn’t address the potential benefits of keeping addicts from being violent clearly enough. In addition the failure rate of rehab for getting users completely off drugs is not discussed. Their position is apparent but way interject too much opinon behind the position without enough evidence.
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Free Heroin
1. You could concentrate on the cause of why Heroin addicts need Heroin and the effect it has on their mind, body, and community.
2. The most persuasive evidence “They are just sustaining their addiction.” I like this sentence and I completely agree with it. If you’re against heroin users getting free heroin (like I am), you can work off that sentence. Provide examples how the heroin users aren’t able to function normally and act like zombies on the drugs. Is that a life worth living?
3. I didn’t understand what side you were on, whether you were for or against heroin addicts obtaining free drugs.
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1. I think the author is trying to say that once diagnosed with a terminal illness, it is a spiraling downslope from then on, and euthanasia is a solution that has more positives in the long run. Nothing ever actually gets better as the persons health declines, everything progressively gets worse. I’m sure there’s a much simpler and profound way of putting this, but euthanasia is a much more practical last resort than heavy doses of medicine, life support machines, and endless hospital bills.
2. The author fails to make it persuasive because it has no feeling/emphasis behind it. This is a very emotion provoking topic, so provoke someone to feel upset for a person who is suffering, family members faced with huge medical debt, a patient feeling hopeless, having nowhere to turn. In my opinion there is no better way to make someone agree with you than to get them to put themselves in a possible scenario, for example, where they are the one hooked up to those machines.
3. There is no cause to someone being isolated, just an effect.
4. This is the same question as question 2.
5. The argument is made that with enough medicine there is no such thing as “unbearable pain,” and that with enough painkillers the patient won’t feel a thing.
Not only does this method of dealing with pain become very expensive, it can also create a loss of dignity.
Whether patients have insurance or are paying out of pocket, it’s going to cost excessive amounts of money.
Second, when patients are being kept alive by heavy doses of medicine, they lose their sense of independence.
They can begin to feel like a burden to their loved ones, knowing that even though it sounds terrible, their death would ease a large amount of stress from their family’s shoulders.
All of these struggles cause patients to want their lives to come to an end.
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Need to finish this assignment in silence.
Euthanasia
I very confused by this essay. I’m not sure what the author is trying to prove. The claim that there is no such thing as “unbearable pain” is confusing. How can you define unbearable pain?
What is the argument about, the cost of the drugs, the dignity of the patient?
Imagine you’re a member of a jury deciding whether euthanasia should be legal based on the arguments here. In what ways does the evidence and reasoning fall short of convincing you? Not convincing at all, the thought process of this essay is unorganized.
The desire of euthanasia can be the effect of years of dealing with the constant pain that certain terminal diseases can cause a patient. The argument is made that with enough medicine, there is no such thing as “unbearable pain”, that with enough pain killers, the patient won’t feel a thing. Not only does this method of dealing with the pain become very expensive, it can create a loss of dignity. First, constant sedation of a patient becomes very costly. Whether the patient has insurance or paying out of packet, it is going to cost someone a lot of unnecessary money. Second, when a patient is being kept alive by heavy doses of medicine, they lose their sense of independence. The patient becomes confined to a hospital bed, their only outside contact is those who come to visit them. They can begin to feel like a burden to their loved ones, knowing that, even though it sounds terrible, their death would ease a large amount of stress from their families shoulders. All of these struggles causes the patient to want their lives to come to an end.
Forgetting Childbirth
The paragraph in blue below is the bulk of the author’s Causal Argument about the Benefit of Forgetfulness.
Does it make sense that suppresses painful memories for our benefit? A woman who forgets the pain of childbirth might be more likely to have another child. But a man who forgets the pain of third degree burns might be more likely to play with gasoline and matches.
Does it help or hurt the Author’s argument to ignore pleasant memories?
As you know, claiming that an Author shows “insufficient evidence” is not an effective rebuttal, but can you offer any small evidence of your own that would refute this paragraph?
If you were to ask a woman what child birth felt like, she might describe the experience as the most painful experience of her life. The soreness after birth, may remind a woman of the pain she went through during her time in labor. However, as time goes by and soreness fades, the memories of a painful childbirth begin to be forgotten. Therefore, a woman may want more children afterwards. If a woman was able to remember every moment of childbirth and the intense pain associated with the process, she may not want to go through the experience of a tough labor again with another child. A year after giving birth, the woman may describe the experience as “not so bad,” where weeks after the birth, she described the experience as “the most painful experience of her life.” If we weren’t able to forget painful memories, we wouldn’t be as willing to experience memories again that may end painfully. Our memory shields us from everlasting unpleasant feelings by fading away details of an event.
Desperate Housewives
The paragraph in blue below is the heart of the author’s Causal Argument about The Pursuit of Happiness.
The Author is making a Causal Argument. Are we clear what the terms of the cause(s) and effect(s) are?
How well does the Real Housewives example illustrate one half of the comparison between superficiality and meaning?
Would the Housewives of Atlanta agree with their characterization here? Does it matter that they might not recognize their superficiality?
Superficial aspect result in despair. Desperation is not a good way to live ones life. When someone yearns for something they can not receive or will not receive this is portrayed as desperation. As stated in previous papers the Real Housewives of Atlanta are a perfect example of showing women who yearn for unnecessary, materialistic items to try to gain happiness.Their superficial pursuit results in a race for who can have the most and who can gain it the quickest.The cause in this demonstration, to gain “happiness” through the newest and best objects money can buy. The effect is a life that is unfulfilling due to the constant disappointment that maybe the best of everything is unattainable
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Euthanasia:
The author is trying to prove that euthanasia should be allowed for those who seek it. One cause/effect that has been skipped and could be easily touched upon: The person being so ill that medicine just won’t be enough to keep them alive regardless. If I was apart of a jury I would need to see more evidence for the use of euthanasia. I am fine with the claims used here, but I would like more if possible. Euthanasia/”mercy killing” is a very serious issue and the more information that supports it’s use the better. Also “Paying out of *pocket”. Also to there is no need to lengthen the sentence: “They can begin to feel like a burden to their loved ones, knowing that, even though it sounds terrible, their death would ease a large amount of stress from their families shoulders.” It can be shortened to: “The patient can begin to feel like a burden on their loved ones, and euthanasia would reduce stress from the family”.
Forgetting Childbirth:
Suppressing the pain the comes associated with childbirth is actually apart of the act of childbirth as a whole. The woman’s brain releases oxytocin during childbirth to help reduce the pain of the process, and to relieve stress. As soon as the child is born, there is a mass release of oxytocin that gives the new mother a “high” that keeps them from focusing on the pain they just endured from labor. I do believe that suppressing painful memories is for our benefit, because if we were to focus on every painful moment in our lives we would hardly function in the world. Take learning how to ride a bike. At some point, we have all fallen off our bikes and received a nasty scrape on our knees, elbows, etc. If we continue to focus on the memory of that painful event, then we will never be able to get passed it, and we will never learn how to ride a bike. Ignoring pleasant memories benefits the passage seeing as how it focuses mostly on suppressing bad memories.
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Euthanasia
1. It sounds like the author is supporting Euthanasia because they understand why someone would feel that death is their only answer.
2. Instead of stating a simple cause and effect they give certain scenarios that might cause someone to feel like they want death but it isn’t certain. They make it seem like as soon as a patient is put on pain killers they feel like a burden and want death.
3. Feeling like a burden and losing their independence along with the fact that the patient is being kept alive is costing someone a lot of money making them feel guilt.
4. Not everyone who is being kept alive by medicine wants to be put to death. The author brings up the money aspect of being in the hospital but even if it is expensive the money it is costing people isn’t “unnecessary” since it is saving someones life.
5. First, constant sedation of a patient becomes very costly, whether the patient has insurance or is paying out of pocket, it is going to cost someone a lot of unnecessary money.
Forgetting Childbirth
1. Not really because it could end up being dangerous and you could get seriously hurt. For example if your hit by a car and forget what it feels like and try it again you could end up getting seriously hurt or killed.
2. Yes because people remember good things like what their favorite food taste like.
3. They might not forget the pain but just like kids and think the pain is worth it for their child.
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Euthanasia
1.Single effect with many causes because he states that taking a high does pot medicine can cause several effects to the patient
2.A patient is being kept alive from heavy doses of medicine does haven’t to feel a lack of independence but maybe happy to be alive and breathing.
3.The cause and effect of heavy dosage of medicine on the person actually body such as addiction.
4.It has no evidence of how the heavy dosage affects the person body, it can be harmful band lead to addiction so why should it be legal.
5.The patient can began to feel as if they are causing a huge burden on their family and that death would ease the stress on them (second to last sentence).
Forgetting Childbirth
1.I believe that suppressing a woman’s pain during childbirth is something great because it keeps her from feeling this horrible experience when all in all she is performing a miracle of giving birth. Now for the man playing with matches it was his choice to do so. Even if his recovery is painful or painless he will be granted the following opportunity somewhere along in his life to play with matches again, its his choice to burn or not.
2.Hurt’s the Author’s argument because pleasant memories are what makes life meaningful and worth living if someone had no pleasant memories they would extremely depressed and in need of help.
3. If women know that childbirth is painless and soreness of it afterwards is the only frightening thing to be scarred of I believe more women would have babies.
Free Heroin
1.This is a definition essay trying to define the true meaning of treatment which this author thinks Vancouver isn’t doing, it does have a simple one sentence causal claim but other then that it is a defiant ion essay
2.”The addicts have a choice whether to go to a detox center or not, if not they can get free heroin for life. They are just sustain their addiction.” This is persuasive because it makes sense that instead of walking to a hospital to do heroin the addict can walk to a clinic to enter a detoix to never do heroin, it’s the users choice.
3.Yes because he uses his own persuasion and states everything the program at Vancouver has to offer and goes against it, well.
Desperate Housewives
1. They are not clear because the author uses half of his paragraph as a definition essay of despair and desperation.
2.It does this by explaining what these women yearn for which is the newest items and best objects money can buy to make themselves happy.
3.They would not agree because they are to vain and arrogant to notice, but its certainly doesn’t matter what they think because it is easily noticed that they are looking for meaning in the wrong tools and items.
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